come clean {the sound of freedom}

Come on, lover. Let’s do this.

Of course you don’t want to face it. Not now. Not ever, really. But let’s go there. It’s time.

You want different than what you have. You don’t love him, not anymore. You’re not fit for this glass-walled corner office and the perpetually tepid coffee from the staffroom. You hunger for graffitied concrete, crumbling brick, and a hard shot of whiskey that burns all the way down.

You want dogs, not children. You actually like olives on your pizza.  That thing you did, in the dark corners of a secret room, it’s eating you alive.  And no, that longing for her, it’s not ever going to go away.

Come clean, now. Chin up, love. No, it’s not going to be easy, or even gentle. Truth telling rarely is.

But you can do it. Indeed, you must.

It has been so long since you have given voice to what lives at core of you that you’ve forgotten exactly what was true to begin with. The lines between reality and justification blur until the agony of all that has been stifled drives you to the earth.  The silenced wail held tight in your chest slashes through your center and tightens its noose until even breathing seems impossible.

Exhale now. Let it go. No matter what darling, you’ve still got to breathe.

Come clean, love. Lay down the burden of life only partway lived, of half-truths, of circumvented clarity.

It’s been so heavy. The weight of all you are not saying is holding you tethered to an existence far too small for the immensity of you. Shred the explanations, the excuses, the masks, and the veils. Drop all the tired layers that obscure your heart from the world.

Lay it all out. Leave your inside voice behind. Scream till your voice threatens to leave, and then wail some more. Let it loose – get primal and raw and messy. Cry all the tears you’ve sealed deep inside. Every secret passage scrawled in your journal and kept under lock and key. Every smothered bit of knowing you’ve kept locked down deep in your bones.

Let it go.

There is nothing to be gained by holding on any longer.

Life calls for one thing and one thing only, that you live from the clear and present center of yourself.

That you live your life as a blazing testament to your truth, whatever that may be. Wherever it might take you. Whoever you lose or leave along the way.

It’s true. Sometimes truth is a vicious wrecking ball. But amidst the rubble lie the embers that will spark your emancipation.  Your truth, spoken clear and true, is the light that will illuminate spirit and wisdom and a path that is all yours. Your voice fans the flames that will sustain you on the journey you were meant to take.

Do you hear that?

It’s your voice. Your mother tongue. The language of your soul. The one you were born knowing but forgot how to speak. It has returned to you now. It will never leave. It comes from the deep-rooted center of you, and rises unadulterated and whole. Echoes into the world and lights your way.

Fierce and gentle. Strong and mighty. Pure and clear and true.

Do you hear it? I do.