100 things I learned in 2011: Part Four

77.  I still feel – even after ten years – that bedtime is the work of evil spirits, sent to leave me broken and begging for mercy.   Every. Single. Time.

78.  Melatonin was sent by the goddess to make it all okay.

79.  For the love of all things good and holy, listen to my friend Marybeth when she says  “Less Talk.  More Do”.

80.   I should probably start listening to Marybeth**

81.  The world would be a better place if everyone wore pretty lingerie.

82.  And even better if people matched their underwear to their outerwear.  Try it…you’ll see.  My lingerie drawer?   A color coordinated rainbow of beauty.  Truth.

83.  Even after four years of shared custody – especially after four years of shared custody – not having my children with me every day still feels intrinsically wrong.  It’s a little slice of broken heart that never leaves me.  Accepting that this is just so makes it a little easier to bear.

84.  It can take a while to find your groove. If you give it enough space and you are on the right path, the ease will always find you.

85.  The only way to know if you’re on the right path is to keep on trekking.   One foot in front of the other, all the way home.

86.  I am completely and totally addicted to chocolate and refined sugar.

87.  Being almost entirely vegan does NOT mean you are automatically healthy.

88.  When I find myself at social gatherings, unable to eat any of the food, I deal with my resentment by smugly tallying up how many extra empty calories you omnivores are consuming.

89.  Andrea Gibson is still god to me.  I see no reason to pretend otherwise.

90.  And Brandi Carlile is my goddess (and no, six concerts in four years is NOT excessive).

91.  And believing she will marry me one day is NOT delusional.

92.  I don’t confuse your/you’re and know the difference between there/they’re and their, but semi-colons may be the death of me.

93.  Finding out that Betsy Johnson bras in a particular size are the absolute perfect fit for me in every way shape and form AND finding out that they are carried at Last Chance*** for $3.97 was a bit like finding religion (and having a threesome with Andrea Gibson and Brandi Carlile).

94.  Okay, maybe not quite that good.

95.  Justin’s Chocolate Hazelnut Butter.  By the spoonful.  (refer to #86/87)

96.  It is 100% possible to get utterly and completely burned out doing something you utterly and completely love.

97.  If this thing happens to be the basis of your livelihood this creates a bit of a problem.

98.  Sometimes that means you’ve gotta get over yourself and just Get. Shit. Done.  (for clarification, refer to #79/80).**

99.  Hula hoops are not just for children.  Learning that will leave you black and blue and completely exhilarated in a way you have not been in years.

100. A circle of women may just be the most powerful force known to humanity.  If you have one, embrace it.  If you need one, seek it.  If you find one, for the love of all that is good and holy, dive in.  Hold on.  Love it up.  Get naked.  Let them see you.  Let them hold you.  Let your  reluctant tears fall.  Let yourself rise fierce and love gentle.  You will be changed.   The very fabric of your being will be altered by this, if you allow it.   Please, please allow it.

{To my circle (you know who you are) this year would not have existed in the form that it did without you.  I would not have cracked and grown and unfolded and relinquished and laughed and cried and loved the same without you.  My profound gratitude, my unending love, my heart and body and soul – they are yours.}

**In some cases these lessons will be continuing in 2012.
*** If Andrea is my god and Brandi is my goddess, Last Chance is my mecca and my holy grail.

Find Part One Here
Find Part Two Here
Find Part Three Here